Death Accepts No Substitutes

President Wilson once received a call in the middle of the night from a civil servant who informed him that one of his appointees had just died.

The caller said, “While I’m sure we are all saddened by this news, I would like to know if I can take his place.” There was a pause at the other end of the line before the president replied, “It’s all right with me, if it’s all right with the undertaker.”